By hook or by crook

Leopard print skirt and a pen for a spear, I’ve been job hunting. Not in a shameless hard-core “HIRE ME” sandwich board hung around my neck walking down Swanston Street at peak hour kind of way, but in a I’m-black-listed-on-seek.com.au-for-harassment kind of way. As far as effort goes, I’ve sent out so many resumes that I pretty much spammed myself with confirmation emails. Once, I received a rejection letter in my inbox merely 5 minutes from hitting the send button. True story. All I can say is, it sure does bruise ones ego enough to cause major mojo dysfunction.

Cut to me laying on the ground in my undies, eyeliner streaming down my cheeks, clutching onto a bottle of whiskey singing Randy Crawford’s One Day I’ll Fly Away.

Needless to say, I don’t take rejection well. Somehow the wheels in motion slowed down and at one point, I was staring at a blank slate, at the brink of 1st world depression. Where to, what to, how the hell to now?! Truth be told, things have always happened for me serendipitously and I didn’t expect the job market here to be so…..how do I say this, shit? Maybe things just came too easily for me in the past. Maybe I’ve just not been trying hard enough, sitting idly in this state of wretched comfort, I’ve gained nothing but 5 pounds.

Fun fact: Did I mention that I have 32 different versions of my resume saved in a folder titled “ARGHHH”?

A funny thing happens when you become idle. You forget what it was like in the working world, you start to doubt your own capabilities which once was the corner stone of your self-worth, and your dreams start shrinking to the size of failure-proof normality. Your dreams of being something larger than life becomes one that’s smaller to strife. Thing is, I could be and do anything, if only I knew what it was. Past few months have been one of self-reflection. The experience has been humbling to say the least. I’ve never been unemployed. Moving cities meant moving my life and lifting my spirit nowadays means lifting it from a glass. I’m a dole application away from being a borderline alcoholic. (dear future employer who decided to check out the url on my resume, I’m just kidding, of course.)

I’ve painted out a rather bleak image for you haven’t I? It’s not all bad to be honest. I still have my freelance but I do miss the sound of staplers going off, using a printer and getting a monthly paycheck. Those leather jackets on Asos aren’t going to buy themselves yaknow!

So the hunt continues, now in increasing velocity and desperation. I’m setting things in motion, writing out my daily agendas in the morning over coffee and ticking it off through the day before tea time. Through it all, I’ve maintained a somewhat foolish optimism (The Secret on replay kind of way) that I’ll land myself a job soon, by hook or by crook, I’m gonna fake it till I make it!

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7 comments

  1. Here’s to wishing you the best job ever! 🙂 Good luck!

    1. I’ll cheers to that! 🙂

  2. This is too good – maybe it’ll score you a job as a writer 😉 Loved it and wishing you the best job ever!

  3. I quit my job back in 2007, stupidly thinking that it would be oh-so-easy to find another with the same perks and salary, and it took me close to 9 months to find another one in Malaysia (ironically, the same type of job was highly in demand in Oz, but circumstances at that time had me turning down a good offer, sigh).

    I know how dispiriting it feels to send out applications, wait for replies, watch your bank balance dwindle, and get lazier and less motivated to even get out of the house daily (yes, I reached that stage)…BUT, on the bright side, it does make you appreciate employment a whole lot more once you get one! =)

    All the best in your job hunting, babe (I agree with Marina, I think you could be a fantastic writer!)…just like relationships, the perfect one will come along when the time is right! Good luck!!

    1. Wow, thanks for sharing your experience and encouraging words. Must have been a tough 9 months, but I’m glad it panned out for you.

      I’m feeling rather foolish now, after turning down a job opportunity some 4 months ago, not realising the job market here. How that backfired! lol. But trying to be optimistic that everything happens for a reason.

      Thanks, I do hope to get a job soon, and when I do, I’ll be happier than a bird with a fry 🙂

  4. Hey hey keep your chin up! Pity the people stuck at jobs that suck the life out of them because of necessity, and how lucky you are to be “unstuck”. Those jobs that went by probably just wasn’t meant to be. I know both sides of this coin. Life is funny like that.

    1. That’s true. Thanks Cina, you’re right. I’m using this free time I have to take up a short course on design, while i job hunt and do some part time. Hope it gets me closer to finding the right job! 🙂

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