Why We Con Ourselves


Imagine….

You’re running late for work, you’ve just got your monthly and you haven’t brushed your hair for two days, thanks to your 2-year old howling at your hip. You dash out of the door with remnants of toothpaste on your lips which has hardened into a white film of crust resembling dried drool, sitting by the corner of your mouth. You don’t notice these things anymore.

You make a mad rush for the pharmacy for some heavy-duty sanitary pad – cos you know your second day is your heavy flow day. You’re crouched at the bottom shelf rummaging through what seems to be 101 boxes and packets of tampons and pads. Your skirt is slightly hiked and you can feel a slight breeze down your back, indicating that your thongs are probably showing, when you hear your name being called. Suddenly you notice a pair of feet next to you and you look up slowly…. and there he is, your ex. And he’s not alone.

Shit.

You shoot to your feet, all embarrassed to be seen crouching down on the ground like some bag lady looking for cigarettes in a bin. You feel a tad irked by his nonchalant demeanor. Him in his ripped Diesel jeans, arm slung casually over silky-hair-skinny-legs and stilettos of a thing. You struggle an awkward smile and an overtly enthusiastic “Hi you!”, hoping to distract them from the fact that you’re having difficulty remembering the fundamentals of the principal language otherwise known as English. Skinny legs responds with a polite nod and taps her finger on her grinning lips “There’s like this thing on your….yeah…there.”

Bitch.

Your ex breaks the ice with a desultory exchange of personal information. She’s Jeanette. They met at a photography workshop in Italy. Been going out for a year. He’s doing great. Just got back from Spain. Got promoted. Is moving back. Should catch up soon, after his trip to the Amazons. November he says. Lets meet in November. You say sure. You’d love to. You say goodbye, make him promise to keep in touch and then watch them mosey out of the pharmacy and into their Croissant & Latte days and Moet & Caviar nights. You hear her laugh as his defensive gestures indicate a retort, as if to say “She used to be hot babe I swear!”

You catch a glimpse of your reflection as the sliding doors closes behind them and you slump into sullen defeat. Of all days! Why did you have to bump into him today along with Victoria Secret on legs?!? Before you know it you’re at the beauty section talking to a girl half your age about eyelash extensions and longer lasting lipstick. You want to get rid of the wrinkles around your eyes, a lotion to smooth out the pigmentation and a nice nail polish to go with the lips. You’ve got no time to make punch mental numbers so before you know it, you walk out with tampons worth $4.90 and a bag of make up worth $178 – bag of fleeting hope.

The magic of make up is not that it truly makes you look flawless or accentuate a jaw-line you don’t have, define cheekbones you can’t quite see anymore. The magic is the comfort it brings. It is the cosmetic equivalent to Oprah’s book club. You don’t care if it really works, in fact a part of you know that it probably won’t but for that moment, you believe in the myth, the legend and fairy tale that is Revlon. That sheer glamorous ‘F You’ gesture in the flutter of your lashes, , that glow of happiness in your blushed cheeks, that glimmer of confidence in your lipstick – which now lasts up to 8 hours.

Don’t get me wrong. There is absolutely nothing wrong with finding hope in anti-wrinkle creams or crying over The Color Purple. There is nothing felonious and foolish in a new eye shadow. Its certainly a lot better than drinking yourself silly and flirting with random man for comfort. Hell if you can afford it, buy it anyway but don’t get all mirror mirror in the wall with your make up. Just careful not to buy into the whole marketing gimmick of “This too can be you!” when they unveil the new Longer Lashes Waterproof Vibrating Mascara worn by Rihanna. Retain that mature sensible self that you are. If you complain about paying $10 for organic tomatoes but splash $70 on some cellulite cream (a.k.a sell-you-out cream) then maybe you need to step away from the mirror and check yourself.

Check out this video. Its a great insight to what you should already know.

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6 comments

  1. If you want to learn how to grow longer eyelashes then you NEED check out my blog.

    Eyebrow Growth Products, Eyelash Growth, Eyelash Treatment

  2. Somehow I think the bigger picture has been missed….

  3. Hahahaha!

    Another nice one Tersh. More please!

  4. Hey Wendy!

    Thanks 🙂
    Haven’t blogged in a while. Have gone rusty.
    Now have time, will write. By the way you’re on my rss feed
    on this iPad app called Pulse. You haven’t updated in a while.
    Please do so.

  5. I have updated! I just use my wordpress blog now instead. Aw I’m on your RSS feed? u’ve been fed wrong then. Anyway I don’t write much I just post pictures on my site now. I can’t write anymore.

    But yes, it seems like you have more time now for more insights yes pls.

  6. Oh no. I’ve been getting the wrong feed? What’s your new blog address?
    As for not writing, your photography is beautiful. It speaks in quantum.

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